Last progress report done

I presented my last progress report yesterday. It was good. They didn't make me cry this time haha.

I have to defend my dissertation in June. It excites me, but there's a lot to do before that. I want June to come quick, then I don't want it to come so quick. I should keep working hard without giving any breaks now.

I will call my stats friend tomorrow and ask him for help for the pre-test analysis. He's too busy to help me but without his help I can't do anything. I want to finish analyzing the pre-test soon. Because next week I'll give the post-tests....

I'm done with the treatment by the way. It was great. All the students were very enthusiastic about the subject and they thanked me for teaching them something so 'cool'. They responded very well.

Progress Report on Dec 7

Hello again!

It was a busy week, very busy. And it's not over. Anyway, before I complain too much here's what I have done this week:

1. I finalized my lesson plans! Yay! I even had my jury members review them and they said I'm good to go. So, I'll start my treatment this Monday. Excited!

2. I met my stats friend and we did the first part of the statistical analysis I need for my progress report. He's a PhD student as well, and very busy so it's difficult to catch him. I'll try to see him again this week and finish the analysis of the pretest with him. Then, I'll start writing the analysis at the weekend.

3. My 4th (and last) progress report will be on 7th Dec. The next one will be my defense in May or June. I already feel like writing my acknowledgements and give my Oscar speech, but I need an analysis and a conclusion chapter written first :D

Anyway, I'll see you after I give the first part of my treatment on Monday.

Bye!

Towards the 4th progress report

Here are some updates:

1. I almost finalized my lesson plans. I just need to make them look good. The content is done.

2. I graded all the pretests. They're ready to be entered to SPSS.

3. I wrote my task descriptions today.

What's next?

1. I have to enter the data to SPSS next week. I don't have SPSS on my mac, so I have to wait until I start work on Monday. I plan to finish computerizing the data on Wednesday and call my friend for the analysis.

2. I want to rewrite my methodology chapter because a lot has changed. I'm planning to do it on Saturday and Sunday.

3. I need to see my supervisor to ask about stuff I'm not sure about. If he says I'm good to go, I'll give my treatment the following week.

I'll be back with more updates later.

4th progress report soon...

I was sleeping peacefully...until the guilty feeling woke me up this morning. It happened again. Ok, I just realized (I knew it before too of course but this is how it happens, it just strikes me) that I have only one month before my next progress report and I have to analyze my pre-test for that.

I will call my friend to help me with evaluating, computing and analyzing the tests.

I need to be quick! Next week is holiday and people won't be found around. I need to be smart! Damn!

Pre-testing tomorrow

Been a long time...I did things, I took it really slowly. I did what I have to do (almost).

I still need to finalize my lesson plan. It's almost finished. I will try to see my supervisor this week to show him the plans.

I'm going to collect the first part of my data tomorrow. I'm nervous. I printed out my materials just now. I'm so afraid of doing something wrong.

After I collect my data tomorrow and on Thursday, I can start working with the data (a friend will help me with it if he's still in town. If he's not, I'm gutted.). Meanwhile, I'll still be working on my lesson plans. I'll also decide on the date to give the treatment if I can meet my supervisor this week.

I'm just so nervous. Bear with me.

Will it be good?

Ugh, where am I?

I have this guilty feeling building up inside me. I went to Hungary, presented my poster, had a great time...back for like 10 days and there is still the last part of my plan to be completed. It has utmost importance for my dissertation (hence avoiding?), yet I haven't found the right mind to start working on it.

Work has started too...so responsibilities calling everywhere. I need an emergency plan...Ok.

So, I need to finalize my tasks and make lesson plans for the classes I will be teaching soon.

I need all this done before October. Next week is too busy with unacademic, social gatherings which can't be avoided..a wedding to attend, bayram to celebrate, referandum to vote etc.

I will start working on the tasks starting Sept 13...? (bad date...a social event to attend ugh)...ok then 14? 15?...No, the wedding. Ok, starting Sept 16, I will work on my tasks until Sept 19. And from then on, I will work on my plans. (This all depends if I can meet my supervisor and get feedback from him as well.)

I like Septembers because they hint life. I find summers rather lifeless, aimless and pointless. But this is too many things squeezed in a month!

It will be good, it'll be good.

Updates

I finished the analysis and wrote the conclusion. I also designed the poster so I seem to be ahead of my schedule. But, I still need to have my poster re-designed by someone professional and have it printed out.

I also came up with a new task, a challenging one. I will work on my tasks because I feel like there is something wrong with them. After I figure it out and fix it, I will start making the lesson plans, and I'll be done for the summer then. Well, the summer will be done too because I need my supervisor's feedback on these things and he's nowhere to be found. I'll probably only see him in Hungary at the conference. Right now, I don't know what to do.

Task completed (I think)

Ok, I couldn't do anything the whole week because I had to work uhm at work. So, I could only work on the analysis this weekend. I think I finished it. It sounds dull to me, but I don't care that much. Now, the next task is writing a conclusion...which looks like it's gonna be difficult. I'll be home most of next week and will try my best to finish it on time. I wrote so much, I don't know how I'll fit everything into a poster for the conference. (ok ok, one thing at a time, calm down, relax, only focus on what's next!)

So, it's all fine. Little left for the conference but I progress decisively! (and it's actually great that I deal with the pilot analysis now, it will make my job easier when I write the analysis for my dissertation next year)

See you after I write the conclusion!

So, Task 2 is completed too (kinda)

I'm back!

So, I had to go to work this week, and this ruined my plans...that's why I'm behind my schedule by two days (wait, I'm not behind! Just noticed I expected to start with task 3 on 18 July). I could only work on my dissertation this weekend (well I did my readings during the week..aren't I good!). This means I kinda (I need a book which is in my office to finish) finished working on my second task, yay!

This week, finally, I will start working on the analysis of the last part. It's necessary for my poster presentation. Since, I'll still be going to work this week, I'll probably fall behind the schedule again. I'm hoping to catch up next week, though. Because, I'll be on holiday after next week.

I started to like my thesis more after working on it like crazy this past month! It started to make more sense :)

The plan is to finish the analysis by 23 July...impossible I think. But we'll see. I'll be back with updates next week.

Task 1 completed

Ok, so it's 11 July. I'm here as promised. I finished the first task in my list. Actually, I finished it on Wednesday...I was quite ahead of my schedule, and I could've started with task 2 but I didn't, oh well.

So, today I should've started it but I still haven't (I don't know what I was thinking when I said I will start it on a Sunday). I will tomorrow. I don't know if it's gonna be easy or not...right now it feels impossible. I will be going to work these two weeks and I'm a little nervous about it. I might not find the time I need for my dissertation.

Anyway, I'll be here on July 16 to tell you if I achieved my next aim or not (I hope I will).

Until then, bye.

New to-do list with specific dates and details

New responsibilities keep coming...making me afraid of the next semester. I know I usually work better under pressure but this is getting out of hand. I just hope all these new resp's won't get in my way of writing my dissertation.

For the summer, the plan is still the same except that I have to devote a few weeks to my new task.

I've been reading lately but haven't written anything yet. I keep thinking about everything that needs to be accomplished by the end of the summer, and not seeing any solid progress makes me feel uncomfortable. So, the devil in me wants me to make a more detailed plan now.

July 2 - 11: Keep reading and write the section on role of instruction

July 11-16: Update the section with causatives

July 18-23: Finish the last part of the analysis

July 25-30: Write the conclusion for the poster

Aug 1-6: Finalize, and print the poster

Aug 8-13: Make the lesson plans

Hmm, it looks more achievable this way. The only challenging task is the first one. It might take longer than I may think, but we'll see. I'll be back here on July 11 to tell you where I am.

Alles gut.

Desperately trying to find motivation

I've been so uneasy today. Been thinking and thinking about how to spend my time most efficiently dissertation-wise. All the work I have to do makes me want to vomit. Instead of vomiting, I ate, and ate, and ate....today.

I will note down the main points I have to work on until the completion of my thesis (just to make myself feel better):

• Update the section on causatives
• Write the section on role of instruction
• Update and finalize methods chapter (which also means write the lesson plans for the treatment)
• Finalize pilot stats and get ready for the poster presentation
• Pre-testing
• Treatment
• Post-testing
• Follow-up testing
• Write the data analysis
• Write the conclusion
• Finished?

Am I forgetting something? Yeah, the most important part: Find a new statistician because I ate the first one. Oh, here we go again...Busy summer ahead, not only dissertation-wise. Hoping to get the first 4 done by the end of the summer. I'll be back with updates but not feeling like being productive anytime soon, yet.

3rd progress report

*Sigh*

I presented my 3rd progress report today. Everything was going well until someone in my jury asked me a question I couldn't avoid. She didn't like my answer and now they want me to collect my data again, I mean AGAIN - third time! I'm trying to be calm. It will sink in soon but still it makes me feel bad. I mean they could have told me that something was wrong before I was this far...and sometimes I think they are amnesiac.

Well, whatever. I have to accept this fact. So, new plan is (for the summer):

- Finalize the analysis for the pre-test anyway because I'll present it in Hungary in August

- Get my lesson plans ready for the groups I'll teach next semester

- Finalize literature review and methods sections

Now, I'll look on the bright side. There is one thing I know for sure now...that I'll finish my dissertation by the end of spring semester next year because if not, they'll kick me out :D Ah certainty, I like.

Getting ready for the 3rd progress report

Hey, I've been dealing with my data now for almost two months and it finally started to make some sense. I started writing my data analysis, and have something to present in my 3rd progress report next week (June 9). Tomorrow, I'll keep writing my data analysis. And at the weekend I'm hoping to finalize the analysis for the first test...have it read by my supervisor on Monday or Tuesday and present it on Wednesday. I'm very pessimistic about life in general.

Stats scare me like hell

Ok, here I am. Been struggling with my data all this time. I entered all the pre-tests to SPSS and met a statistician, then another, then another and was still lost. I sat down to work but kept staring at the screen. Literally, statistics is a different language to me and I don't understand a word. I feel like stupid and inadequate and it keeps getting worse. I am also very stressed about it because I want to present some of my results in my next report which is in like 20 days!

Today, I decided to go to the statistics department of my university and hire someone to help me! Luckily, a friend of mine referred me to his friend and he agreed to help me. You have no idea how relieved I feel now - well not much haha. Because I've been disappointed enough about statistics before and I will only stop stressing out when I finish my data analysis I guess.

So, this week I'm going out of town to attend a holiday-like symposium (yay!), and when I come back next week I'll hopefully start working on my stats again.

Stats give me butterflies! and sleepless nights!

PS: Today I collected my last follow-up test. So, finally done with data collection!

Edit: Hahaha I love google ads. As soon as I posted this blog, I got an ad saying 'Need help with your data analysis?' Oh, sure I do!

Sorting out my data

I met the statistician this week and he gave me some suggestions about data analysis. There will be two procedures since my research aim is two-fold. The first part is relatively easier. But the second procedure is something I haven't done before and my lovely statistician said: "It's a very difficult analysis but I'll help you through it." Well, data analysis will be my major concern in the upcoming weeks. Right now I'm grading my data. I have a huge pile of papers to grade and enter in SPSS. It will take longer than I thought because grading is so boring! (Well, I'm not really grading but assigning values to each item in the tasks)

I'm hoping to be finished with grading by the end of next week. Actually, I must...I don't have much time left before my 3rd report.

So this is it.

Data data data

*SIGH*

Been lazy. And it makes me feel really bad. I haven't written or read anything since January. Part of it was due to something unexpected. But the rest is my fault. I don't want to do anything. I'm never motivated or excited enough to finish my PhD.

I must change this though, very soon. I decided, since I'm not in the mood to write or read anything now, I will start playing with my data. This weekend I'll work on sorting out my data and entering a sample to SPSS. I will meet a statistician this week and if he says I'm on the right track, I'm planning to computerize all my data very soon. I'll also ask for some advice regarding the data analysis procedure.

I sent an abstract to a conference some time ago and this week they let me know that my article is accepted as a poster presentation. The conference is in late August. So, my data analysis must be in good shape by that time. Actually before that because my 3rd progress report is due June! Remembering I haven't even added a word to my last report gives me the shivers. I'm hoping to be able to say at least a few words about my data analysis in my report.

To keep it short, I'm not good. Gah, all I want from life is to be finished with this shit.

Long absence

"If you don't hear from me, you know why."

This is how I ended the previous post. But you really don't know why. Lots of things happened, personal stuff and I didn't have the right mind to do anything related to my dissertation.

I must get back to work soon. Real work. Sitting down and getting back to writing.

Well, maybe I did something while I was absent. I collected my follow-up data from the first group, and gave the pre-test to the second group. This week (on 23 March), I'm giving them treatment. So, I keep collecting data.

I still need to work A LOT on my literature. And once I collected all of my data, I need to sit down and try to figure out what to do with it. (I'm scared).

Keep following me.

Done with report 2

Had my progress report meeting last Tuesday. As I feared, they questioned my small number of subjects and suggested (ordered) that I should collect more data. It made me feel demotivated but I got used to the idea. Now, as I can't start working with my data, I will spend a few months finalizing my literature and methods chapters. But I wonder when I'll find the motivation to start working again. I'm in that lazy stage.

If you don't hear from me for a while, you know why.

;-)

Progress report 2

Ok, I have a dissertation that keeps growing. This Tuesday, I'll present my 2nd progress report (hoping that the 4th one will be my defense and I'll be done with that). I made a presentation for Tuesday and am more or less ready to tell my jury about what I have achieved so far.

After the report, I'm planning to continue working on the literature review as it still requires a lot of work. I don't want to start working with my data yet.

All good so far. See you when I have some progress!

Before the 2nd progress report

Still writing the literature review...today I finally started working on the methodology chapter. But it takes more time than I thought. I will keep working on finalizing a section in the lit review and methodology chapter tomorrow. On Tuesday, I'll see my professor and get his feedback before I make copies for my jury. Next Tuesday I'm gonna submit my 2nd progress report.

Looking back, I achieved most of what I planned after the 1st report except that I haven't finished the lit review. I came to believe it will never be done. I still and will always hate writing lit reviews.

Have I told you I gave my post-test last week? My data is almost complete except the follow up test which I'll give sometime in the second semester.

Bye